It is amazing how encouraging and supportive a group of people whom I have never met can be. I can't thank you enough for your kind support in wanting to follow me as I continue to reach that glorious goal weight and keep it off. I am giving it a few days before I make the blog private so that those who want to follow have a chance to let me know.
Thank you especially to those who shared their stories of gaining back some of what they lost. Your determination to keep going and to keep blogging inspires me. Tami - thank you so much for checking up on me from time to time. You are a dear, dear woman.
So, what happened? I was so on track and determined. I truly believed I had changed my lifestyle, but slowly old habits began to creep in and it felt better to cope with life's stresses by overeating than using healthy coping methods.
I have gained about 40 pounds from my lowest of 160. Depressing. However, the cycle has been broken because I am fixing things before I gain all of my weight back and more. Let me tell you, gaining quickly feels a lot different than losing quickly! I can actually feel my inner thighs getting bigger as I lay in bed at night. It is weird!
This is day four of being back on track, eating in moderation.
I have some decisions to make in terms of my food plan. I would like to remain on the path of eating in moderation, however my daughter has been diagnosed with GERD and is medicated for it. There is a possible connection between treating GERD and going gluten free. In support of her, I am eliminating wheat from our diets completely. She is NOT celiac in any way and we are not doing this to follow a fad. It certainly is not to lose weight because many who go gluten free actually gain weight. We are hoping to see a significant reduction in her symptoms as a result of eliminating gluten from her diet. (she is not overweight)
Most depressing is that I have NOTHING to wear. I gave away all my clothes as I shrunk out of them. I will have to lose 20 pounds in order to squeeze into my dress pants and jeans. I have a few outfits that work and I have refused to buy larger clothes. That in itself has been motivating because I enjoy dressing well and looking put together.
I am looking forward to reading about where all of you are in your journeys. It was too painful to keep up with everyone's journey whilst I was struggling so deeply.
The good news for me is that I tend to lose weight as quickly as I gain it, until I reach the mid 160's. Then, it slows down and takes forever. In the meantime, I will report decades and right now, I need to journey back to Onderland. That is one line I NEVER believed I would cross again! It's very close.
Eating less, moving more,
Dawne
After 30 years of struggling with losing weight and gaining it back, I am ready to live the journey to health and wellness. I have discovered, thousands of dollars later, that dieting is not the secret. The changes required go far deeper than calories in and calories burned. My plan is to reach a healthy weight without counting calories, diet drinks or bars, but simply by eating less and moving more. It's my time.
Getting There!
16 comments:
This is just part of your journey, Dawne. I know it's trite and easy to say that, but getting through this will only broaden your life experience. Seems like there are several bloggers who have come back from breaks, and it feels like the good old days of, like, a year ago! Always keep us updated! <3 Happy Valentine's Day!
Dawne, I would love to follow you privately. Reading this post somehow resonates with me. A couple of years ago I was diagnosed with a thyroid problem and ever since then I have been falling apart. I feel the fat creeping on at night and where before I would wake up and the bloat from the night before would be gone now it seems to be bigger, The clothes also got me I won't throw out what doesn't fit but I will not buy anything bigger so yoga pants all day every day. I can't remember the last time I buttoned pants.
I am hoping that someday I have that moment that will "click" and this madness will stop but until then I hope stories like yours will push me to start making the right decisions.
I was reading another blog the other day and they had this quote on it.
If you focus on results you you will never change if you focus on change you will see results.
I think it something we need to be reminding ourselves every day.
Hi Dawne! You have no idea how happy I was to see your new posts in my google reader.I took the weekend off from the computer so I missed all of this excitement. I am delighted that you are back. It is an answer to my prayers.
I know the feeling of shame about gaining. I have done that so many times in my adult life - and I have a closet full of different size clothes to prove it!
I too thought I had it figured out this "last" time. We just have to keep moving forward and "managing" our food plans and weight.
I have had to really shake my food plan up this time in order to get any weight to come off. What worked last time wouldn't do it this time. Hormones!
Of course I want to follow you and cheer you on! Together we can and will do this.
It might take a village to raise a child but it takes an entire blog sphere of cheerleaders to lose weight!
Keep moving forward and try not to dwell on what has happened.
What is most important is what you do now.
I am off to find you on Facebook. Did I tell you how happy I am that you are back?!
Would love to continue to cheer you on to victory!! And so sorry that people can be so mean and thotless. debsdailylife at aol dot com.
How lovely to lose fast. :) That's not me! BUT..at least you know Onederland will come in a hurry. :D
Definitely try the gluten-free. It resolved my GERD. No kidding. And I felt so much better off it, my sister is now off it. And a few other of my friends saw how it benefitted me and went off it, and two report feeling significantly better in the fibromyalgia dept.
So, yes, report on that!!!
Onederland, here she comes, AGAIN! And for good, I believe it!
You will find your way again. It sometimes takes a few attempts to reach our goals. I love your blog as its so honest. Do you still read my blog?
Hi Dawne. You probably do not remember me. I attended a scrapbooking retreat at Teen Ranch that you also attended. Your story touched me and I have been following your blog and quietly trying to convince myself to tackle my extra weight. I will turn 40 this year. 5 weeks ago I finally decided this was going to be my time as well and I joined Weight Watchers. I have never felt better by just making better food choices. I would love to continue to be a part of your journey. My email address is kobycreative@yahoo.ca
Thank you,
Koby
It is making me smile from ear to ear when I see you pop up in my reader. I have so missed my Canadian friend! I am very close to being gluten-free and cannot begin to tell you how much better I feel.
Please include me. My email is Margeneishere(at sign)yahoo.com
I think we're all on the journey of losing weight and learning how to keep at a healthy weight. You are def. not alone in that! I'm all for being here for each other. I have appreciated your comments on my journey!
With love,
~Margene
PS - Happy Valentine's Day!
It made me happy to see your post in my reader too - I would love to follow your "new" blog if you are willing to let me. My email is katiejisonherway at gmail dot com.
I can understand why it was hard to blog and keep up with others while you were struggling...I felt exactly the same way. It seems that some have even stopped reading my blog because I was gone for a couple of months. It's sad really, because the last thing we should feel when we're already struggling is that we've let others down. It's such a shame that you ever received that horrible comment...anonymously no less. We should all be supporting one another, and extending grace and understanding when we see our fellow bloggers struggle...not judgement. For those of us who are in this battle, we should understand better than anyone how hard this journey is.
Be blessed as you move forward Dawne...you ARE loved and so appreciated!!!
It's been such a long time since I looked at my blog roll, much less read any of them. I think it's serendipitous that I happened to see this post in the nick of time. Whenever I read you before, you were always the clear reminder that slow & steady does it. And you were always charitable and kind to me when I replied.
May I please be included when you go private? My personal email (separate from my blog email) is gratefullee at the g - mail - com.
I would love to follow your progress. My email is transparent.joy@gmail.com.
I know you will be back at your starting point soon! And I think you are brilliant for getting rid of your larger clothes. Probably if you had more to wear, you would keep gaining. That's what I always did. Right now things are snug for me...I'm struggling with 5 pound weight gain and it's killing me! I refuse to purchase new bigger clothes. I will be a stuffed sausage until I get these pounds off. So we can do this!!
Keep focused!
Dawne,
One thing I remember well from my sociology class was the professor saying, "time is a human creation." Along those lines, I think that the same is true for numbers. It's easy for us women to get focused on a number so much so that we don't take into account muscle mass and fitness and all other important health factors.
I've been following your journey and have tried to keep up, though my motivation often wavers. I'd love to be included as a reader as you continue your journey because you are such a bright light. nicholsonks at yahoo. Thank you!
Dawne.....I could have written this exact post (minus your daugher and gluten free of course :). I am up 40 lbs from my low of 160 as well and I too have no clothes to wear as I gave them away as i got smaller. I also refuse to buy new clothes. I havent been blogging in a while so I had no idea that you were living the same experience as I have been. But...we will get back on this journey together and support one another. We can and will do this. I look forward to our journeys. And I wish the best for your daughter.
Jennifer
www.wecanlosethepounds.blogspot.com
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